As a San Diego divorce lawyer who has focused on custody issues for the last 12 years, one of the most stressful times of the year is when children go back to school.
It is difficult enough for parents who have issues with co-parenting to decide which extra-curricular activities their children should participate in. What happens when school is starting and that dreaded list of school supplies comes out? How do parents decide who buys which items? What happens when one parent decides a certain item is unnecessary?
As a San Diego divorce lawyer, I can tell you that purchasing school supplies is one area of disagreement that can cause stress as well as embarrassment for children. Think about how it would be for a child to return to school on the first day of class without a certain required item when all other children have that item. What excuse does that child make? Do they tell the truth and say they did not purchase that item because their parents were fighting and could not agree on whether it was needed.
Of course, one solution to this problem would be for one parent to use their own money and buy the item for their child. This however, is a short-term solution because what usually happens then is that the parent who refused to buy the item tells the other parent that they can buy all the supplies in the future. This isn’t fair to that parent and in the long run isn’t fair to the child because buying school supplies is actually an experience that allows a parent to bond with their child and to share a school activity with them.
Instead of causing embarrassment for the child, the parents should discuss the school supply list in advance and determine who will buy which supply for the child. If they cannot figure this out, then a co-parenting class may be needed since this is probably not the only decision they have trouble making together.
As a San Diego divorce lawyer, I believe it is imperative for my clients to understand the importance of working together with the other parent for the sake of their children.
